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31 May 2009 - Towards the Waypoint (Term Break)

this is so ohmygod. Process control assignment is due this coming week and I haven't finish it. so many things are stressing me out, especially MST. serious shit, some module contain 30% which is so heavy that I think I will probably drop dead if I do badly for it.

but well, I think PC is the one thats really stressing me out. firstly, we have to come back during the holidays for lectures and tutorials (which is actually, a good thing though I feel so lazy). the assignments aint easy...and concepts are... -_-"

1 more week to term break, looking forward to it. parteh time when it comes.
BUT THE AMOUNT OF WORKLOAD IS LIKE A MOUNTAIN !

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As Good As DEAD on 1:43 pm

28 May 2009 - Gym in School

went to school gym as usual with WC and Donald, but today's different, because I felt a little embarrassed.

there was this equipment which can set according to height. that thing was at the highest point and I had to tiptoe to adjust the thing down. there were a group of dragonboat girls around there doing weight training. WC, being a nice guy as usual, offered to help me and asked "erm, you need my help?" when I just finally managed to adjust it down.

and the next moment...I got laughed by those girls -.-!! because of my height. AHEM. damn. SO PAISEH TOTALLY ! LOL ! but one of the girls were so serious and said "don't laugh".

we were laughing among ourselves too and WC felt guilty despite the many times I told him its ok. lol.

Epic failure for the day though, I didn't work out as hard as usual. bloody hell.

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As Good As DEAD on 10:12 pm

28 May 2009 - Laziness

there are times where my brains, simply refuses to think.

because my brain is lazy.

cant even smile

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As Good As DEAD on 12:08 am

27 May 2009 - Words Can't Describe How I Feel

Fucked up, seriously fucked up. this god damn thing, happens over and over again..

and the rain at this hour makes it even more depressing.

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As Good As DEAD on 2:40 am

26 May 2009 - Knocked Out

my ears, burning.
my ears, painful
my body, totally feeble.

I've never felt so Tired before. its enough. I really need a rest. can I?

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As Good As DEAD on 10:28 pm

25 May 2009 - The Insides

today is a day in which is a little shocking, at least..for me that is.

I can never imagine how one could have cooped up all the awful feelings for long, and not showing them out. I realised it was something extremely tough to do, but nonetheless, today turned out to be a day, I get to know the insides a little more.

there are many things in which, we as friends could never do anything to help besides lending our ears solemnly. we can't solve problems, we can't fix things the way we think may be right, but we listen. at that point on, it was not anything about the lecture anymore, the things we just learnt, came out of its own naturally.

I strongly believe, those who were there listened with heart, not for the sake of doing well, but as a kind of concern. the eyes never tell lies.

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As Good As DEAD on 9:02 pm

25 May 2009 - Need a Breather

there are times where people feel helpless. my time has come once again. I feel kinda screwed up many times, loathe the workload even though I seem to do lesser work compared to the rest, and I just feel like hanging out with buddies.

I feel..different. probably because what I held on to, is no longer there.

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As Good As DEAD on 12:35 am

24 May 2009 - When Time Drags

stayed over at CC's house with zj and zg on Friday to slack, to play, to do my work. that day was long, for we were awake till dawn, and one by one we fell asleep.

I did some work back there, but there's still a pile undone which worries me somehow. when the three week break comes, it will kill me even though its called break. theres shitloads of work during that period, plus a week needed to revise for MST. come to think of it, I don't call it a term break at all. its self-study period.

when I find my life different from others, I find it boring sometimes because its kinda dull, and so many stuffs thats so happening keep hitting me, yet someone actually said I have an exciting life. bleah.

I started work the moment I came back from his house, spiritless..and my eyes were getting freaking heavy. losing to temptations, I slept and when I woke up, I started work again..at my own pace which gets so slow..
1 graph question can take me almost an hour. its so absurd.

I really envy those who are stressed up with personal/school matters and yet able to hide those torments in them, spend their days happily still. if I could be half like them, I guess I would be someone much better.

somehow, its so heartwrenching to hide the truths.
initiative took, and then comes refusal. confessions that were unheard turned barriers which splits the earth. everything, is all in one place.

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As Good As DEAD on 4:31 am

22 May 2009 - Happy Birthday to Alicia~

HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!!!! MAY YOUR HEAD GROW BIGGER !! LOL

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As Good As DEAD on 6:41 pm

21 May 2009 - Heavy Heart To And Fro

When theres a blind man with a walking stick, tries to reach for an escalator, and that he had difficulty finding his way, probably there would be somebody helping. Thank god there was someone who helped, and eventually when the train came, he was assisted when entering the train, fortunately, there were empty seats.

Train to school was tough. as I sat beside the blind man, thoughts ran through my mind..about his whole journey to his destination and all. some may think I'm crazy but, the fact that even sympathy can make the heart sink sometimes.

Destination was at Clementi, but when he alighted together with a horde of people, the eyes were on that poor guy all along even when the doors were closed. shockingly, nobody held his hand and guided him or at least helped him with directions.

We all know that in life, majority only think about themselves and I know I'm no exception. I have never believed that there would be someone who would put others first and place themselves second. Never. even those that I thought of, proved me wrong. Whenever we talk about good deeds, values to learn, we know them but who the hell really knows how to apply?

Whenever problem arises, instincts would tell you to "Point fingers, Its Not My Fault Dammit". If theres anyone who tell me they have never done this in their life ever before, they can go screw some Plushies.

Its sickening when it comes to pointing fingers, and not doing a self-reflection first before blaming others. Many a times I asked myself, whether the problem lies with me whenever shit happens. but I realised its not all the time, but I was taken the blame all the time, for the sake of whatever actions I did not do as well.

Scenario 1:
A: "Eh? You never tell me?!"
B: "Oh? You didn't ask?"
A: "It's your fault for not telling me lor"

Scenario 2:
A: "Eh? You never tell me?!"
B: "Oh? You didn't ask? My fault meh?"

thats the experience that happens time and again. its sickening, when you are the one that gets blamed, in either scenarios that is. wherever I go, I get distracted when it all striked me time and again.

Hao Ren Rong Yi Bei Qi Fu.
I'm not saying myself, but on behalf of someone else. those who blame others all the time, have they ever blamed themselves for once? yeah, they blame themselves if they hurt themselves. nothing else.

P.S: If not for Your hyperness that brought laughter to me, I think I would have gone crazy for that day. I can't thank you enough, even though you may think, you have done nothing to help, but then again it has a good impact on me.

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As Good As DEAD on 12:47 am

18 May 2009 - Sleep 1st, Others Later

as for now, I need to organise myself once more.

first thing - SLEEP GONNA COMES FIRST, the rest can hold on until I have energy, like the Mafia Wars in facebook -> no energy, no work.

when I'm damn tired, and my mood is not at its best, I need to rest. but when I just wake up, I feel lazy. problematic shitz.


Update: I feel very tired sometimes, mentally. the workload is just...sickening..

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As Good As DEAD on 11:33 pm

17 May 2009 - Inhumane Acts by Japanese

I understand the fact that many teens love japan for its anime and its trendy culture. but if you look at this post, you might wanna give it a second thought.


Please be reminded, if you cant stand gore stuffs, skip this post.






























Fuck you people seriously, who goes against the nature

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As Good As DEAD on 5:40 pm

16 May 2009 - Putting in More Effort

it's been a mess these few days, and I've accumulated so much work and that this weekend is gonna be busy for me today...but then again I'm not gonna abandon my buddies just because of all the shitloads of work since they are prior to studies. and of course provided I finish much of my work.

(Cheah)
He said he was impressed with the effort that I've put in, but I know I can do more because I haven even hit my own target which is to understand things thoroughly. I always have questions popping out in my head, wondering how things work and so on. thats why I always say...I learn damn slow.

nonetheless, its an overall compliment given, and I know I need to work harder for my own part as well.

gonna start work soon. early in the morning~, finish them up a little and...parteh time~

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As Good As DEAD on 11:21 am

13 May 2009 - Blind Spot

When it comes to learning stuffs, it is always things that interests us that we learn faster, and that those stuffs that have to be forced into the brain takes a much longer time to learn.

and that is why, I don't understand people who never likes to lose. so, just let them win, since they love to dominate that much. I guess I shouldn't stoop myself to a level that low.

if things could get simpler, life would be easier.
afterall, all I wanted is a laid-back lifestyle, an ordinary life which is more stress-free. so whatever's going on out there, as long as it doesn't concern me or my buddies, I wouldn't care less. however, there are few who motivates me to study a lil harder, even though many a times I still fall asleep.

for now, studies, play a little, nothing else.

making a poker face everyday, and like my bottle writes:
shut up and train.

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As Good As DEAD on 11:43 pm

12 May 2009 - When Good Things Gone Bad

Rage hits again.
How long has it been since then.
Time would reveal everything?
What the FUCK was I really waiting for all these while?

For something that NEVER HAPPENS.
Until now, not even a word.
What is the meaning of this Shit.

Talk about values that were learnt.
I'll throw them all.
Courage to face, to confess, its all BULLSHIT.

As of today, I realised its all the same, no difference at all.
You chose to keep reasons and leave guesses, whats the difference between you and the rest then.

Blame it on myself, for putting too much Faith on the wrong person again.
At least if the Truth is known, the nerves wouldn't snap that bad.


Update:
When people get angry, they tend to lose sight of the better side of things, but it also means that its the limit that they can handle. so perhaps, I've failed to control myself in handling my own matters

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As Good As DEAD on 7:00 pm

11 May 2009 - Overworking Muscles

My arms are giving me pains now..guess I did too heavy back at the gym in the afternoon, and that my muscles have gone jelly now..blah.

school work..too much totally..

When the limit is near, you think of something you so wanna get rid of..you can summon more power for awhile, and then later realise you overdid it.

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As Good As DEAD on 11:50 pm

11 May 2009 - Mother Day's Dinner

went to Yishun for dinner in celebration for Mother's Day. the food sucked, but there were still hell lot of people around. I guess everywhere was just as busy during that period. talking about food, we ordered quite a bit for just 4 people.

1) cereal prawns, the prawns were not from the sea, because they are damn small, thats another thumbs down.
2) the chilli beef or whatever, they put curry powder nevermind, but they put too much. booyah~
3) pineapple rice best, really is pineapple, and rice. with abit of floss and bits of eggs for $9, the quantity is shit small as well.
4) here comes the worst. shark fin seriously sucks, because the quality is equal to those pasar malam (night market) 1 bowl $2+ that kind.

like, whatever. I'LL NEVER RETURN THERE TO EAT EVER AGAIN UNLESS I'M ALMOST STARVED TO DEATH AND THAT IS THE ONLY PLACE I CAN FIND FOOD. then I will patronise that stupid place.

coincidentally, charmaine, beatrice and their family were there too, WITH A OMGBBQ CUTE KID AROUND LA ! I SO WANTED TO PINCH HIS CHEEKS CANNNN LOL !
Hes another cutest thing ever alive man. lol.
she (bea) was carrying him for like almost the whole time, what a great time for a Mother's day I swear, she totally looked like the mother of that cute baby. envyyyyyyyyy~

we didn't greet each other though, because I looked...different? like she couldn't really recognise me or something. not for the worse I hope. but well, why could charmaine recognise me then? oh yeah, charmaine mummy, your 'not-quite-your-sonson' wishes happy mother's day to you now. not too late I hope, if you still see this blog that is. haha.

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As Good As DEAD on 12:16 am

10 May 2009 - Happy Mother's Day

as stated on the title, Happy Mother's Day to all the nice mothers out there, especially my mother like duh~ (goes without saying)

Looking at our own mothers every single day seem to be something very ordinary. but well, because of her, we are brought into this world, with those meticulous care, showering love and concern.

some mothers are strict, demanding, while some are lenient and easily satisfied with life, no matter what kind of mothers they are, we as their children love them much more than we can hate them.

instead of thinking how your mother scolds and nag at you over small little things, why not think back and recall how your mother took great means to take care of you when you were seriously ill. well, we know that doesn't happen often but hey, everyone knows that our mothers love us all.
so why not, take a day off and spend a wonderful Mother's Day with our Mum today =)

No matter what it is, Family comes first, because of my mother who have done the most for the family, from domestic to everything.

Brothers and Buddies second, CC, winston, BH and gang and the list goes on, they know who they are. Life is much more exciting for me thanks to them, their existence together with me knowing them, is a gift from Heaven I guess.

Friends third, while Studies..can go far far away actually, I wouldn't care less LOL. alright I'm bullshiting. Studies are after Friends, not for myself though, but for the sake of my parents.

school's getting busy, MORE WORK to do as from now. sooner or later, there wouldn't be time to even play a game or two of dota. sianned.

Life's been fun, especially when seeing how happy my bros are, like CC..telling me these and that about himself and his surroundings everytime we meet. looking at how happy he is now makes me feel so envious many times. and not to forget Matt, your time will come soon I hope. lol. for now, its work for you =\
Alvin, you're so MIA-ed. lol. meet up soon yo.

I'm more than contented with life now. no heavy shoulders, can really make one literally fly.

During those times..
You were the source of Light I needed for places I couldn't see
I felt I wasn't alone wherever I walked, for your presence was always with me.
You were that piece of puzzle which would complete this thing called My Life.
But the aftermath
Your voice, body, soul and everything left me, and got me blinded in the Dark.
I either stopped and stared, or simply wandered around Alone.
You made me realise my puzzle would never be able to be complete.

Because the most excruciating period has passed, I know I can walk a few steps further.

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As Good As DEAD on 12:59 am

08 May 2009 - Mas Selamat "Hari Raya"

some big news reported early in the morning. nah, I dun mean the Malay New Year is coming, but rather, the guy who chut stunt and did a prison break and "explored" the outside world for
1 Year 2 Months 11 Days
got caught and will be thrown back behind bars again.

I hope there won't be a Season 2, like totally.

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As Good As DEAD on 10:04 pm

07 May 2009 - Let Loose, Get Crazy

Wednesday, indeed was fun, because theres GEMs lesson.

back in school today, after the Process Control lecture, went to meet up with CC and Matt and coincidentally, WC for pizza and then GEMs !

story telling, and reading. sounds boring right? BUT IT WAS FUN especially when you twist the passage that was given by the lecturer.

went to meet HuiXin with CC after school, and then slacked around while waiting for Matt to knock off from work, till 5+pm and then to CWP to get my new pair of slippers...after saving up for some time of course. Black + Red = PERFECT COLOUR MATCH ! haha

somehow, I dun like going home recently, not because I dun want to see my family of course, but I don't wanna think of stuffs thats bothering me sometimes, as usual. I guess I prefer wasting my time in school, slacking around with buddies and happy-go-lucky people. at least everyone feels my existence. I can't believe a CLS member like me hangs out with a bunch of EEE members which are all from HX's side. lol.

I just wanna Let Loose myself, get Real Crazy, have a Fun Time, Live my Life the Relaxing Way.

Quote of the Day:
"Theres a bunch at the end who weren't listening throughout and, he didnt see them at all ! he must have a very blurred vision, or got tired of such stuffs. (I was sleeping from time to time, and didn't listening to what he was actually saying)"

sorry but I don't think and make such wonderful comments. and I think few who read this would probably laugh their ass off. its a quote. Q-U-O-T-E

Before anyone enters the "Fault Zone", please do a Self-Body Checkup. Get the drift?

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As Good As DEAD on 1:20 am

05 May 2009 - A Balance of Love And Hatred


*credits to kiyneug for original picture.

A Balanced Half-Fledged - A Little Happy
A Devilic Half-Fledged - Sick And Tired...
A Full-Fledged Angel - Love And Satisfaction
A Full-Fledged Devil - Hate And Destruction

In life, people are usually happy, and gets sick and tired sometimes, love and cherished memories, and hate the many happenings or tragedies that approached them. Everyone experienced it all these, its just a matter of
How Much, How Little.

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As Good As DEAD on 12:23 am

04 May 2009 - Fighting Bristleback Flu

Additional Precautionary Measures: 4 May 2009

  1. Controlled access by car/MRT/public buses
    With effect from 4 May, entry to Singapore Polytechnic will be restricted.

    1. If you are driving, enter via Gates 1 & 3 along Dover Road.
    2. If you are travelling by MRT/public buses, enter via pedestrian gates at T1A, Dover MRT Station and Gates 7 along Commonwealth Avenue West; and Gates 1 and 3 along Dover Road.

I guess its just not SP thats tightening security, many crowded places in Singapore are probably doing the same thing.
To fellow friends, Buddies and Brothers, take care of yourselves and drink more water. The weather together with the flu really can make one fall ill easily.

I guess I'll be hating Thursday train rides to school and the everyday train rides back home. its all so squeezy and...imagine if one person got that flu, whats gonna happen? I'm wondering if theres any measures that could be done with regards to transport for this stupid flu. well, I do not know, but I would say its a tough challenge for the Government, considering millions of people take public transport everyday

To CC: YEAH MAN !! Congrats being the First among us for having a Er-Sao for us LOL

Though with Deep Hatred thats inside me, I'm a little contented with life somehow...I guess...I've got over the pains that lasted for months.

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As Good As DEAD on 11:59 pm

04 May 2009 - Head Start

I guess starting from tomorrow, school life's gonna get busy especially with FYP around..whatever. I did a little bit of work, I dunno if I should feel proud of it, or fault myself for not doing more, it depends on how I actually see it perhaps.

Life's getting boring, though busy. I need to hangout.

and yo Dazzle, I dunno if you'll get to see this but let's just hope you will do well for your Mid Year Exams, and not get too stressed up.

Back to Gym, Time to Vent Frustrations Once Again.

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As Good As DEAD on 1:00 am

The Cursed

Kelvin Yeo (Mista Badass)
Up till 19.
Pisces. 24 Feb is when you get to call me old man
I'm your typical short guy living next door
Adaptive to everywhere I am in
My eyes can talk
But do you understand its language?
The Mirror-Effect Guy
(Attitude-Reflections Treatments)


Come Find Out Yourself
And The Music Goes


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